


i even got it on camera

by toflowerknights



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Coming Out, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 06:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4294701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toflowerknights/pseuds/toflowerknights
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>finn is a vlogger and bellamy is... not stalking him</p>
            </blockquote>





	i even got it on camera

Bellamy was sitting in front of his screen browsing through videos when a video popped up in his recommended window. It was by Finn Collins, someone in the same school as him and Bellamy clicked it, even though he had seen it before.

It started with Finn’s blurry face too close to the lens before he pulled back and greeted his audience with a wide grin.

”Hi, guys,” he said and pulled his hair back from his face. ”Things have been a bit hectic lately, but here’s a quick look back at my week.”

It went into a montage with the worst fucking background music Bellamy had ever heard. It was filled with shaky clips of Finn doing such mundane things it was hard to understand why people watched this at all. Most featured him with his best friend Raven Reyes running into the lake behind the Griffin’s residence, or zig zagging through the mall laughing maniacally with the security guard right behind them. One had Finn eating an ice cream in slow motion, and damn if that hadn’t Bellamy hard within seconds.

It all ended with Finn laying in bed, looking like he was ready to fall asleep at any second, with a sleepy smile on his face.

”That’s all for today, get out of here!”

That video was two weeks old. Bellamy frowned at the date, since there should’ve been two more videos after that, one for each week. Not that Bellamy knew this. He wasn’t checking every single day to make sure that Finn had uploaded something new.

”I can’t believe you’re still stalking Finn,” came a voice from the door.

Bellamy whipped around and blushed heavily when he saw Octavia stand in the doorway with a pleased smirk on her face.

”I’m not stalking him,” Bellamy said slowly. ”I’m…”

Octavia’s grin widened when he couldn’t come up with a less creepy sounding answer.

”Stalking,” she repeated and left him alone.

Bellamy muttered something unintelligent to himself and stared at Finn’s sleepy smile for a few more moments.

 

Bellamy woke up with a gasp and two seconds later he realised he had slept through his alarm. He had been up half the night to study for a biology test he had the following day and all of a sudden it was 4am and he was supposed to be asleep. As he tried not to curse his sister and her firstborn for not waking him up he ran through their house and out to his shitty car. He made it to school with minutes to spare.

The first thing that hit Bellamy was the whispers. Everyone was standing huddled together, hunched over their phones and looking over their shoulders to make sure that no one was listening. Bellamy felt as if he had missed something important and hiked his bag higher up on his shoulder nervously.

He found Atom by his locker.

”Dude, what’s going on?” he asked.

Atom looked at him as if he had grown two heads. ”You haven’t seen it?” he asked while at the same time pulling out his phone.

Bellamy looked at him questioningly and shrugged, not really sure what he’d missed in the twelve hours it had been since they last saw each other.

”Collins came out last night,” was all Atom said before shoving his phone into Bellamy’s hands.

Bellamy felt as if all the air had been sucked out of his lungs and with a pounding heart he looked at the screen, where Finn’s video was loading.

He could see the difference before he’d even pressed play. Instead of the shaky footage and bright lights of his usual videos there was only Finn, looking pale and so young.

The title just said ’Coming out’.

”So,” Finn said toward the camera. ”I guess I’m doing this.” He rubbed his eyes tiredly and Bellamy wondered how long he had been sitting in front of his camera before he even turned it on.

”I just talked to my mom,” Finn continued and his voice was low and raspy as if he’d been using it too much the past hour. ”She… took it well. I guess. I mean, she’s fine with it, but she… knows where we live and she doesn’t want me to get hurt.”

He sighed deeply and Bellamy bit down on his lip hard.

”I guess I should just say it,” Finn said quietly and looked down at the floor. He gave a half-grin to the camera, but Bellamy could see the nerves in his eyes. ”I’m gay.” A loud woosh of air left his lungs and he let out a quick laugh. ”You know I can’t stop laughing every time I say it, because it’s so ridiculous, you know? I shouldn’t be feeling like this every time I say it.”

Finn’s eyes were painfully blank and Bellamy could see that he was trying not to cry.

”I’m just so tired of feeling like I have to hide…who I am.”

He was quiet for a bit and seemed to be deep in thought. Bellamy tried to ignore the pounding in his chest as

”Anyway, I’m pretty sure that everyone in school has seen this by the time I get there, which is why I made this video. Out with a bang, and all that I guess.”

He gave them a weak grin, waved at the camera and ended his video as he always did. ”That’s all for today, get out of here!”

The video ended and Bellamy handed the phone back to Atom, who was staring at him intensely.

”Wow,” was all Bellamy said. All he could say.

”I know,” Atom replied and just as he was about to get into, what Bellamy assumed was, a deep rant about homosexuality Finn entered their high school.

The whispers stopped.

Bellamy, who didn’t really know Finn other than from seeing him in his videos or across the hall, could see his shoulders slump in what almost looked like defeat. His friend Raven looped her arm in his and stared defiantly at anyone daring to say anything. She whispered something to Finn and he clenched his jaw before raising his chin. Together they walked through the corridor, and no one said a word.

It was the most amazing fucking thing Bellamy had ever seen.

 

 

A week passed and things seemed to be calming down a bit. Finn was still walking through the halls with his head held high and Raven was still glaring at everyone as she walked next to him. It seemed as if anyone even dared think ill of Finn Collins, Raven Reyes would be there to take care of them.

One afternoon after a particularly boring history lesson Bellamy snuck out behind the school, where deliveries were being made in the morning. It overlooked the parking lot and were a perfect spot to grab a smoke, because the lunch ladies were too chill to care. Miller had once joked about them putting weed in the school lunches and one of the had fucking winked at him. _Winked._

Something he wasn’t prepared for though when he had closed the door was Finn’s hunched over form where he was sitting on the cold concrete. He looked up when he heard the door close.

”Oh, hey Bellamy,” Finn said with a crooked smile and Bellamy shouldn’t’ve be surprised that Finn knew his name, but he was.

”Hi, Finn,” he replied in kind. ”I can…” he made a motion toward the door, but Finn only shook his head with the smile still on his face.

Bellamy hesitated for a moment before sitting down next to Finn, feet dangling over the edge.

”How are you?” Bellamy asked, because that’s really what you were supposed to do.

”Oh, you know,” Finn said and rubbed his eyes. ”I’m alright. All things considering.”

He shifted slightly and ended up with his arm pressed against Bellamy’s. ”Sorry,” he mumbled apologetically, something Finn Collins never would’ve done usually. ”I’m just tired, you know?” he continued. ”I’m relieved that I won’t have to lie anymore, but it’s just so exhuasting to pretend that you don’t give a fuck.”

Bellamy didn’t reply, because he didn’t know what to say. Instead they sat in silence and watched as the students poured out of the school building and into their cars. How normal it all seemed.

”You know,” Bellamy started quietly. ”I thought what you did was really brave.”

The smile Finn gave him shone brilliantly.

 

Things changed after that.

Over the next couple of weeks Bellamy and Finn cautiously started spending more time together. The more they hung out the deeper Bellamy dove into his silly crush. It was hopeless, really. Finn was a huge dork that loved old sci fi movies and would always get into long monologues about them. Bellamy, who really only understood around 35%, would nod and try to keep up. What he didn’t know was that Finn brought his camera everywhere, and Bellamy who didn’t really like being in the center of attention found himself facing it more than he’d like.

The first time Finn had raised his camera Bellamy hadn’t been prepared and he had hid with a blush.

”Aw, come on, Blake,” Finn had said with a wide smile. ”Show me that pretty face.”

Bellamy had flipped him off while he covered his face with his shirt. ”You only like me for my beauty,” Bellamy had said dramatically and stuck his tongue out

”Well it was either that or your horrible personality,” Finn said and Bellamy couldn’t help but laugh.

It got easier after time, and sometimes Bellamy would look up to find the camera pointed at him, a pondering look on Finn’s face.

Every time Bellamy looked at the videos Finn uploaded and saw his own face he got horribly embarrassed. It was so obvious, emotions written all over his face.

”I feel almost sad for you,” Octavia said once as she found him staring at his own dopey face on the screen. Finn came up behind him and featured them both in the frame, and Bellamy had subconsciously leaned back against him. ”Scratch that, I definitely feel sorry for you.”

 

”Bellamy, show the viewers how much you love that ice cream.” Finn’s voice was teasing and Bellamy could see his eyes glint behind the sunglasses he was wearing. They were sitting in the the mall, waiting for Raven to show up, and Finn had spent a majority of the time filming Bellamy.

He glared into the camera before going back to his ice cream. ”Fuck off, Finn,” he said and Finn shook his head in amusement.

”Oh, don’t be like that,” Finn cooed. ”You know you love me.”

Bellamy tilted his head up and met Finn’s gaze.

”Why did you come out the way you did, Finn?” he asked, because he truly wanted to know.

Finn looked at him thoughtfully from behind the camera and ate some more of his ice cream. ”I talked to someone I trusted and told him more than I should have,” he said finally, and something in the pit of Bellamy’s stomach knotted itself into a ball of sympathy and sadness.

”It did not end well. I thought he was my friend I realised that I’d rather come out on my own terms.” He shrugged and went back to his ice cream.

Bellamy stared at Finn, ice cream dripping onto his hand, but he didn’t care.

He reached out and pushed the camera down. Just as Finn was about to protest Bellamy leaned forward and kissed him. It was a quick peck and at that moment he didn’t care who saw, because he had wanted to kiss Finn for so long. The moment it was over though Bellamy remembered where they were, and, more importantly, that he had actually just kissed Finn Collins.

Finn was staring at him with wide eyes and cherry lips. ”You taste like vanilla,” he said and Bellamy nodded dumbly. He was starting to freak out now. Not only because of the kiss, but because of the fact that they were in public and Bellamy was still very much in the closet. The only consolation was that they were far enough away from their town that there wasn’t a big chance that they would be recognised.

Just as Finn opened his mouth to say something that was probably really fucking important Raven slumped down between them.

”Fuck, I wanna stab myself in the eye. Mr Kane is so _boring,_ ” she complained and stole the rest of Bellamy’s ice cream.

Bellamy forced himself to smile, but he didn’t take his eyes of Finn. Finn stared back at him with the same wide eyed expression and after a while he smiled brilliantly and nodded.

All of a sudden Bellamy’s own smile didn’t feel as fake.

 

After that everything became a secret, and Bellamy would be lying if he said he didn’t find it kinda hot. They snuck kisses in between classes and spent hours ’studying’ in Finn’s room. It was great, and hot, and amaznig. But in the back of his mind Bellamy felt extremely guilty over forcing Finn to hide again. He hadn’t come out the way he did to start lying again.

”I’m not, you know,” Bellamy mumbled against Finn’s lips once as they were laying on Finn’s bed making out.

Finn pulled back and took a long look at his face. He nodded. ”I get it,” he whispered back. ”It’s okay.”

Bellamy didn’t feel okay. He wanted Finn to know how much Finn meant to him, and it felt as if he didn’t do a very good job in showing it.

”You now, I’ve always thought about this,” Finn whispered. ”You and me, I mean.”

”How long?” Bellamy wondered, because he had too.

Finn blushed slightly. ”Octavia’s 10th birthday party,” he replied and tugged at the sleeves of his shirt.

Bellamy couldn’t fit the pieces together. ”That’s the first time we met,” he said and his heart was beating fast.

”I know,” was all Finn said.

Bellamy had to reach over and kiss him.

”I’ve watched every single one of your videos,” Bellamy said, as if that was supposed to mean something.

Finn looked at him for a few moments and reached out to map kisses against his collarbones, up to his lips.

”That’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever said to me,” Finn said and pulled him in for another kiss. ”Wait,” he continued and pulled back. ”Not the early stuff right? ’Cause that was pretty bad!”

Bellamy only groaned and kissed him again.

 

It happened by accident, Bellamy’s own coming out party. He had been walking next to Finn in the hallway, and Finn had been talking about something, Bellamy couldn’t remember. But he remembered the light and joy in Finn’s eyes and without thinking he bent down to press a kiss against his lips.

Finn let out a muffled sound of surprise and both of them froze, lips still on each other, in the middle of the hallway.

Bellamy heart his heart pound in his ears and Finn’s lips tightened. ”Shit,” he muttered against Bellamy’s mouth and pulled back. ”Shit.”

They both looked at each other with wide eyes and around them Bellamy could hear people whisper. He could see the panic in Finn’s eyes, because they hadn’t talked about this. Bellamy suspected that Finn wanted Bellamy to come out when he was ready, and also he had the sneaking suspicion that Finn thought that Bellamy kept it under wraps because he might still change his mind. The thought bothered Bellamy more than he wanted to admit.

Bellamy felt the tension in his shoulders disappear. The solution to all of this was stupidly simple.

”It’s okay,” he said and kissed Finn again. ”It’s really okay.”


End file.
